Past few days, had been in the css retreat.
Again I was feeling lazy and scared of the retreat, but something in me bugged me to go and I'm kinda glad I went again.. Was feeling spiritually empty before the retreat and now, I guess I can't wait to chew on the words of the entire bible.
The talks were pretty inspiring and touching. Held back my tears for some. On recon night, I had a weird feeling stirring inside me, a sort of looking forward to the confession, to the reconciliation with God...Never ever had this feeling before and I kinda tried hard to conceal my silly excitement and grins while waiting in the long queue for confession..I mean I'm always super scared for confession and hoped very much not to get a priest whom I know for fear of embarrassment and guilt.. Anyway, after this confession, I almost wanted to jump up and down for joy...I felt really really happy and the whole thing still sounds a little absurd I suppose but I'm so thankful for the graces that were showered upon me. =)
It's pretty amazing how God spoke to me again and again, despite how incorrigible I am. This is God's boundless love for me, I guess and I sincerely hope that this time, I'll truly incorporate Him fully into my life and not let Him down again.